We already know that communication is vital to have a healthy marriage. But did you know that communication increases intimacy?
For women we desire to have that emotional connection. If we don't feel heard it's really hard to open ourselves up to feeling loved and wanting to be loved intimately. For men I believe they fear saying the wrong thing. So they are very careful about what they share if anything. Too often they get “in trouble” for what they share. (By the way there is a solution for that. It amazingly transforms your relationship)
Joe Bean, author of Becoming One shares, "For many couples, intimacy would increase if they simply started sharing facts that are completely non threatening. For example, if a couple set aside twenty to thirty minutes every day to talk about their days--who they saw, what they ate for lunch, and the like--they could actually increase intimacy. The very acts of spending time together and communicating (two of the keys to intimacy) feed the intimacy turbine…….” He goes on to share, “Sadly, many couples hardly talk at all. He wants to forget work when he gets home. She’s had a horrible day and would rather forget that it ever happened. They each talk to the kids--if they talk at all--and communicate with each other only in short, essential statements. For these couples, the turbine has gone dry. It isn't producing any intimacy because nothing is feeding it…. IF you want to start increasing intimacy in your marriage, start talking more than you do now. “
You're life isn’t going to make time on it's own for little talking. You are going to have to MAKE the time. Make it a priority. And remember it only takes one to turn a relationship around. Why don’t YOU ask your spouse tonight when they get home, how their day was? And add a smile to it! You just might open the door to more intimacy in your relationship!
"I don't believe you have to be better than everybody else. I believe you have to be better than you ever thought you could be."